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Classic TV

Orm And Cheep

If you want to throw a sicky from work, but feel guilty about not actually being sick, Orm and Cheep is the answer. This program will make you physically want to vomit. I can’t really put into words how “nice” this show is. Eeek!

I’m sure this program is the reason there is so much violence in the world today. Every ounce of goodness on this Earth has been sucked into this show. I’ve already said it once, but I’m going to say it again, it’s waaay too “nice”. If I could have one wish in the world, it would be that either Orm or Cheep, or one of their pathetic friends gets battered by someone with a baseball bat.

Anyway, enough of my whining, let me fill you in on the details. Orm is a fluffy thing that I can only assume is a bird, that can’t actually fly. He lives with his friend Orm, which again I can only assume is a worm. What a “nice” combination. Excuse me for being stupid, but don’t birds eat worms?

Each episode follows some sort of adventure where something or other happens and they meet one or two of their friends (great description, eh?). Watch out though, there’s animals out there that want to eat them, such as Cat or Crow (err, how about Bird eating Worm!!!!?????). Don’t go scrambling around for a cushion to hide behind just yet, as the animals that are their enemy are as wet as a wet thing in Wetsville on a very wet day.

If everything being just so “nice” isn’t bad enough, along with the evil characters that wouldn’t even frighten a, errr, well a thing that gets frightened very easily, Richard Briers narrating really gets up your nose. Why? I hear you cry. Well, it’s because everything is said in rhyme. God damn it man, just tell the story, you don’t have to turn it into a poem. Don’t get me wrong, I have a lot of respect for Richard, but on this occasion I’m going to have to cross him off my Christmas Card list.

In conclusion, this show was great when I used to watch it as a kid, but now it just makes my skin crawl.

On the lighter side though, it’s not that bad if you’re watching this after a small dose of Keith Harris and Orville. Now they’re the ones baseball bats were designed for.

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